Babywearing

I never really wore Joshua when he was little, I did a few times but more around the house when I was trying to get things done and he was being demanding. I have a ‘Moby Wrap’ and it’s super comfy, but not an ideal carrier for the summer as you end up baking. Probably part of the reason why I didn’t babywear very often.

We are going on holiday in May and as we won’t be able to take the double buggy with us, we need other options and one of them is to carry Riley. Hubby isn’t keen of the wrapping process involved in the Moby, and to be fair I find it a bit of a faff and after wearing for a while I find it slips a bit. Not the easiest for taking on and off and swapping who carries him. So I did lots of research and fell in love with ‘Connecta’ Baby carriers.

It arrived on Tuesday and not only is it completely gorgeous it’s extremely comfy. I found an excuse to go to Asda so that I could try it out. It did pull a little on my shoulders, but that was more to do with needing more practice than it not being a good carrier. I’ve been to town, the park and a random walk with the children since and it has been extremely comfy. You don’t feel the babies weight at all. R loves it too and every time he’s been in it, he’s snuggled up and gone to sleep.

Here he is.

J wanted to go in it today, and he was loving it. I just had a wander around the lounge with him. Surprisingly it was still comfy carrying him in it. If I ever decide to babywear J I’d carry him on my back, I just haven’t practiced that way yet. 

My poor pretty green buggy is going to be feeling a little neglected I fear.

Being Creative

Toddler + Lipstick =

 I don't really need to say anything else do I?

Fill in the blanks

I have been tagged by the lovely Beth over at bethan-no-y to do this filling in the blanks-type-blog post. Came at a good time as I was wondering what to blog about today. So if you hadn’t already guessed it’s about filling in the blanks. So here goes, it’s probably not going to be terribly exciting.

I am: A mother, a child, a sister, a wife and many other things. Mostly I am just Lucy, a little lady muddling through life the only way I know how.

The bravest think I’ve ever done: Nothing I’ve ever done has felt brave at the time. Looking back deciding to try for another baby so soon after having a miscarriage was quite a brave thing to do. At the time though I didn’t look at it as being brave; it was just something that that felt right. I was still an emotional wreck and I had no idea how I'd cope if it happened again but I couldn't bear the thought of waiting.

I feel prettiest when: I’m wearing a pair of sparkly, dangly ear rings. I don’t get to do it very often and it usually means I’ve managed to straighten my hair, put on a touch of makeup and some clothes that aren’t covered in baby deposits.

Something that keeps me awake at night: Right now my boys. One who’s suffering with a chest infection and the other who wakes every three hours for milk. Usually though I’m kept awake by my brain going into overdrive and filling my head with random thoughts. Things I need to do, things I would like to do and things I should have done.

My favourite meal is: Lamb shank, stuffed with garlic and rosemary butter served with a white wine sauce and creamy mash.Although you can't beat a nice simliar lasagne with garlic bread.

The way to my heart is: honesty and love. Both of which my other half showers me with. The ability to make me smile, a real genuine happy smile is also very important.

I want to be: A good Mummy. Sounds cliché but it’s the one thing that is the most important to me. I want to do the best I can by my boys.

I don’t really have anyone to tag that hasn’t already done it apart from @Chatty30 Obviously you don’t have to do it, but you can if you want J

The Perils Of Dress Hunting

It’s wee mans Christening next month and that means new outfits all round. Well apart from the little man himself who gets to wear the family Christening gown – Yes my son will be wearing a dress. Both his god mothers have already got their dresses (I do hate them a teeny tiny bit). So that leaves me.

I HATE dress hunting at the best of times, I struggle to find something that suits my body shape. I’m actually convinced they don’t make dresses for short people. As if shopping for a dress isn’t hard enough, add to it that fact that I have no clue what dress size I am, or what shape my body is. Plus due to the fact that R point blank refuses to take a bottle I also need a dress suitable for breastfeeding.
I’ve been scouring the internet since I don’t fancy dragging two kids around the shops. Everything I love is in some way unsuitable. Either impossible to feed in or too expensive for a dress that I might only wear the once. (I’m not really a dress kinda girl).

Look >>>

Pretty, girlie and I absolutely love it. Yet short of taking the whole dress off – which would definitely provide entertainment, but probably not the kind of entertainment suitable at a christening – there is no way I can feed in it.

I need a dress that:
1) Is Suitable for a five foot nothing midget
2) Reasonably priced
3) Suitable for breastfeeding
4) Flattering

I’m not asking for much am I? So people I need serious HELP... are there any fashion gurus out there who can come to my rescue?

Change For Life

I've been thinking about posting some of my short stories on here, I've not actually written any in a long time but I have a stash of them that I've written over the years. So I've decided to be brave and post on here... so here goes. Be nice :-) (Although I do appreciate construstive criticism)

Change For Life


The waves are rough, breaking hard against the coastline. The tide is on its way in, it won’t be long before the seawater is crashing against the wall and splashing any passers by crazy enough to be taking a walk. The water is precariously close to soaking her feet but still she stands lost in her thoughts.

A lot of time has been spent here; long walks with the dog, sandcastles and sandy sandwiches with the kids. Moonlit picnics with her husband, kissing and dancing under the stars. The sea has always been her friend; welcoming and friendly. Today it is dark, angry and heavier. It’s strange how the sea in all its glory captures her feelings so perfectly.

She watches as the sea washes up a piece of litter, hovering on the sand for a few seconds before an angry wave crashes down and whips it away. It lingers on the surface for a while, clinging desperately before giving in and allowing the sea to take it away. She watches it sink out of sight, slowly drowning. She wonders whether if the water rushed over her, it would take her away too. A few seconds contemplation is long enough, shaking her head she forces the crazy thoughts away. People need her, her children need her – but right now she needs her husband. She needs him more than she ever has, yet he’s not here. He left her alone to deal with everything.

She’s shivering but, instead of going home like any sensible person would, she begins to walk along the beach. Weaving slightly to avoid the waves, her mind floats back to that awful day.

She is running late, she has a million and one things to do. “Daniel, would you mind picking Caitlin up from ballet class?” she asks him.
“Not at all.” He smiles, “she finishes at 7?”
She nods, barely having time to reply as she carries on with her baking. They are having a party tomorrow to celebrate Jack’s 16th birthday and she still has so much to do.
“I better get going then,” he tells her. “Got time to kiss your husband before he leaves?”
She sighs, and looks at him, “Make it a quick one.”
He rolls his eyes at her and places a quick soft kiss on her lips. “Love you, see you later.”
“Back at ya,” she tells him.

“Why did I not take more time? Why did I not kiss him properly?” She scolds, hating herself for not appreciating every second she had with him. For not taking the time every day to show him she loved him. She thought she would see him again in half an hour and be curling up in bed with him later that night. Never for one moment did she imagine she would be alone.

He calls to let her know they are stopping for a milkshake on the way home. She is busy in the kitchen, chopping cheese for the cheese and pineapple sticks. Jack is at his friends and she is making the most of the time.
“Oowww!” she winces, the knife clattering to the floor as she grabs for her side. An unexplainable pain is soaring through her body and she crumples, almost falling to the floor. No sooner has the pain arrived but it’s gone again and she is left gasping for breath. With no time to ponder on what it was, she carries on with her preparations.
Time slips away and the hours tick by. It’s not until there is a knock on the door that she realises Daniel and Caitlin should have been home long ago. Flinging open the door a pang of dread reaches for her stomach as tears spring to her eyes. Two police officers stand before her.
“My daughter? My husband?”
“Perhaps we should go inside.” The older officer suggests, and before she even knows what is happening she is perching on the edge of the sofa.
“What happened? Are they okay?”
“I’m so sorry madam; there has been a car accident. Your husband died instantly.” The same officer tells her.
“Caitlin? What about Caitlin?” She questions, not able to process what they have told her.
“She’s critical, but she is in good hands.”
“Take me to her... please.”

She can still hear the clattering of the knife as it hit the floor and she knows now the pain had occurred at the moment of impact. With each day that passes she hates herself more, she should have been the one in the car. She should have told Daniel he didn’t have time for milkshake. If only he had come straight home he’d still be here now.

Flicking her tongue over her dry lips she screws up her face at the taste of salt. She assumes it’s from the spray but it’s not until she runs her hands despairingly over her face that she realises she’s crying. Glancing back along the beach, the sea is edging closer to the steps – the only exit from the beach. It is time to leave. She rushes along the sands, a strong wind trying to push her backwards; an invisible force begging her to stay. Making it to the steps she stands and stares at the sea for a final time, watching the sea wash away the footsteps she had left behind. Washing away any proof that she was ever there.

Before she even finishes pulling into the driveway Jack is running from the house, “Mum, Mum!”
“Jack, are you okay?” she asks as she climbs from the car.
“Where were you? You were gone hours.”
She hears the panic in his voice and guilt floods through her. “I was down at the beach, I needed time to think.”
“You didn’t answer your phone. I was worried Mum,” he tells her.
“I’m sorry Jack,” she apologises. She was being selfish, she should have been here with him, not wallowing in self pity; she wasn’t the only one suffering. She’d lost her husband, her soul mate, but he’d lost his father. “Did you need me?”
“The hospital called, they wanted you to ring them ASAP. Do you think she is okay?” Jack asks his mother, wanting her to tell him everything would be alright.
Sarah watches her son as she pulls out her phone. Since the accident the confident sixteen year old has vanished, he looks younger and vulnerable now. He’s hurting and she doesn’t know what to say or do.

The call was quick; they need her to come straight into the hospital, they won’t tell her why but she can’t help but worry that it’s bad news. Surely they would share good news over the phone.
“I have to go,” she tells her son.
“I’m coming with you,” Jack tells her and they climb into the car and drive towards the hospital. No more words are exchanged between them, there is no need – nothing can be said to make things better.

Pulling the car into a space, mother and son race towards the ward Caitlin has been occupying for the past week. They don’t stop to find a doctor; instead they head straight for her. Stopping in the doorway, Sarah finally lets out her breath. The breath she doesn’t even realise she was holding. Tears stream down her face as she takes in the sight before her eyes. Caitlin is sitting up, her eyes glued to the television...she is awake.
“Mum are you going in?” Jack asks, wondering why they are still hovering in the door way.
“What will I tell her?” She speaks out loud, her tears a mixture of joy and sorrow. She didn’t know it was possible to feel so many emotions so strongly at the same time.
He wraps his arms around his Mum’s shoulders. “It’s going to be okay you know? Daddy is still here, I can feel him. He’s watching over us now Mum – he’ll make sure everything is okay.”
More tears run down her face at her son’s braveness, his words comforting her. “I know,” she smiles weakly, hugging him tightly. “Let’s go see her then.”
Arms holding each other they step in the room, ecstatic that Caitlin is okay – distraught that Daniel is dead. Ready to face the world without him, knowing they are strong enough to make it.

THE END
(C) Lucy January 2010

Dealing with other people's Children

I experienced something today that made me feel guilty, angry and upset. It was a situation that I wasn’t entirely sure how to handle, yet one that I knew I’d have to deal with at some point. No one hands you with a rule book when you become a parent, we have to make it up as we go along.
 
I took J swimming today, it’s become ‘our’ time – no daddy and no baby. Its only the fourth time we’ve been and each week his confidence is coming on in leaps and bounds. The last time we'd been swimming he was only 9months old.

There was another little boy swimming around today, full of confidence and able to actually swim. As time progressed he was getting increasingly closer to my boy, but only when J was feeling brave and tip-toed away from me. The first time this boy got to J he attempted to shove his finger up my bewildered child’s nose. Seriously why? I gently removed his hand and said ‘nicely’, before moving Joshua away from him.

The second time he walked over to Joshua and started pushing him backwards with a float. Joshua ended up pushed back to a step and was looking at me with a face that said, ‘what on earth is going on?’ J is a sweet natured little boy and is always very gentle around other children, (especially younger children) so it confuses him when someone is mean to him. I glanced around for the mother of said child hoping that she would remove her child from the situation, but she was nowhere in sight. So I was left with no option but to intervene. I said something along the lines of ‘Stop that and be nice please.’


I don’t feel it’s my place to have to ‘tell off’ someone else’s child, I’d always remove Joshua from a situation and discipline accordingly if he was being naughty. To be honest I’d probably hate it if someone else told my child off in such situations. Now don’t get me wrong if I’m at someone’s house with my children and they are touching something they shouldn’t be, then I encourage them to let my child know they shouldn’t touch because children tend to listen to other people better than they do their parents. However when we are in a public place I take full responsibility for my children, I appreciate you can’t always see everything they do 100% of the time, certainly not if you have more than one with you. However if you are swimming and have only one small child then shouldn’t you be playing with, swimming with and keeping an eye on them 100% of the time?

Why the parent was not watching said child I have no clue, or maybe she was and didn’t feel the need to remove her child from a younger, smaller child. It makes me a little angry; water is a dangerous place, why can’t parents keep an eye on their children? It’s a baby pool for crying out loud, there are going to be small children in it. The last thing I want is for something to happen to knock J’s confidence and make him scared of water. I don’t let him splash near other children in case they don’t like it. It's common sense isn't it? Or maybe I’m just slightly paranoid, but I hate swimming, I am scared of deep water and that’s the last thing I want for J as it’s horrible. I used to feel left out at swimming parties when everyone else was jumping in and splashing around in the deep end while I clung to the sides.

I feel guilty for telling this child off. Even though I didn’t exactly tell him off, I spoke very soft and gently, just in a firmer voice. What would you have done? Are there any rules for situations like this?

Me Me Me

J has a new word to add to his list of words. ‘Me’, well it’s never just me it’s usually ‘Me, me, me’. We have absolutely no idea where he’s picked it up but it’s very cute. When he wants something he stands and points saying it repeatedly until we respond. It’s probably going to get annoying very quickly but it’s a hundred times better than pointing and whining at us.

I was talking to me friend from Littlemisschatty trying to decide where he could have got it from. Me isn’t a word that is used often in everyday life. Can’t think where we would have used it for him to pick it up. She suggested ‘Finding Nemo’ (a favourite of J’s), we were trying to remember what the seagulls say. After a quick google we found out that they actually say ‘mine’. It’s similar they repeat it over and over when they want something, so it could be from there.

Or it could be from absolutely anywhere?!

The Things Kids Do

I came across this earlier today while I was browsing some blogs, and Qwerty Mum has decided to do this cute little linky thing and I thought I’d quite like to join in.

J loves to put things on his head; books, toys, hats anything that he might be able to balance – along with things that he can’t balance. Which causes gorgeous little giggles as said item falls off.

His dinner plate was a proud achievement of his the other night. Hubby and myself were chatting away while eating dinner when suddenly J tried to get our attention and voila he was proudly balancing his dinner plate on his head. Camera came out of course as I was lucky enough to have my phone next to me – we probably should have laughed as it just encouraged him but it was super cute.

He's a silly sod, but so very cute!

Blog Award: The Irresistibly Sweet Blog Award

First of all I would like to thank Beth for giving me this award, it was very sweet of her.

The Irresistibly Sweet Blog Award

Here's how the award goes:

1. Thank and link back to the person that gave this award.
2. Share 4 guilty pleasures that you have.
3. Pass the award along to some other sweet blogs


Guilty Pleasures

1. Hot chocolate, with whipped cream and baileys – such an indulgent treat

2. Chick lit novels

3. Westlife (particularly Shane Filan ..pwoar) – pretending to be fourteen again at their concerts

4. Watching my babies sleeping when I should be sleeping myself.


Some Sweet Blogs

1. Rachel Beasley - A must read of mine, about the ups and downs of life.

2. Little Miss Chatty - A fab blog, by a fab person (When she ever blogs :P)

3. Unpacked Mummy - A blog I discovered recently written by a lovely twitter person.

Congratulations to you sweet blogs receiving this award from me! You don't HAVE TO POST THIS, thats your choice ;) .

The power of a book

After reading a post on bethan-no-y about the demise in literacy levels in this country it inspired me to write my own post about reading.

I love to read, I’ve always enjoyed reading ever since I was a little girl. I admit I lost my way a bit during my teenage years as other things caught my attention but I found my way back and I read now more than I ever did. I used to dream of finding a magic tree with all sorts of fabulous creatures living in it. I never did find such a tree but it was fun dreaming about it. Reading is my escape; it allows me to be removed from the stress of everyday life for a few minutes a day. When you find a truly good book you become so absorbed that real time passes by almost as quickly as the days in the book, you don’t want to put it down. Just another page and another until you reach the last one. Then you are gutted because it’s ended and even though you wanted to find out what happened you can’t help but feel a little bit sad that you’ve reached the end.

I don’t know many guys that read, my dad does but that’s only something that has come with age. He never used to read. Ant doesn’t read and I’ve suggested to him many times that he should, but he’s not interested. In one particular conversation he told me that it’s only old men that read, I’m sure that’s not always the case but I do tend to find that I know a lot more females that read than males. So am I fighting a losing battle encouraging my boys to read, I hope not.

Regardless of whether they keep it up when they enter adulthood I want to encourage them as children, reading is important. I’ve read to J since he was little, we point things out and he gets bedtime stories every night. I’ll do the same to R when he’s a bit bigger. J loves his books and every time I catch him sitting in the corner (always sits in the corner) flicking through a pile of books I feel a little flutter of pride. I want him to enjoy reading; of course I’d love him to be able to read before he starts school. Doesn’t any Mum? However I will never force him to learn through reading, if he doesn’t want to read I won’t make him. Some days we’ll sit for ages flicking through books, other days we only have a story at bedtime. This morning while I was getting dressed, I left R lying on my bed and J went and got a couple of books and climbed up next to R and was trying to show them to him. Was very cute.

I think the problem with reading sometimes is that people approach it the wrong way – reading shouldn’t be a chore and it you see it as one you’re not going to enjoy it. Find a fantastic, fun, enjoyable book and lose yourself in it. My favourite place to read is in the bath, a hot bath with gorgeous smelling bubbles and silence. It’s completely relaxing; I can travel to another place or fall in love with a character. Lose myself in the deliciousness.

You don’t have to read great works of literature like Shakespeare, if you enjoy chick lits or fantasy then who cares. I love a good chick lit, but I’ll also give any kind of book a chance. There is only so much chick lit I can read, so every now and again I pick something completely different. Pride and prejudice is one of my all time favourite books. It's about time I borrow it from the library again I think.

Fuming Friday

I’ve recently started to follow a lovely new lady on twitter and have come across her blog – unpackedmummy. She has come up with a blog hop idea, and I definitely want to join in. This is a how she describes it.

So I was thinking it may be fun to have a bit of a link up where we can all let off steam about something that annoys us. So every Friday, I am going to write a post where I get something off my chest that has wound me up during the week and put it up here on my blog. If you want to add a post then add your details below and we can really get going, and get ranty, properly!

So this week I want to rant about my parents... now before I start I want to clarify that I love them dearly, just at times they drive me to frustration. They seem to feel the need to feed and then feed my son some more, they are bad enough with me but it frustrates me a hell of a lot more with J. If you offer him cake he’s going to eat it, there are not many kids that won’t. Last Saturday I came home and had a bit of a twitter rant about it as I ended up really so cross.

My Lovely Mummy gave Joshua a scone when we arrived, which was fine it was snack time anyway. Then a short while later Joshua was being a bit grumpy as he is so she asked it he would like some raisins (yoghurt covered ones) he told her No. So she asked him again, and again he said no. So her reply was come with me and lets have a look and 30 seconds later he’s returned with a dish of raisins. Which I add he ate about four of then left them on the table... like he said, he didn’t want them. J doesn’t have many words but he is brilliant at saying ‘yes’ and ‘no’ if he says no he means it. He used to answer yes to everything, then get frustrated that we gave him something he didn’t actually want. Soon he learnt that no meant he didn’t get it if he didn’t want it. So by my Mum giving him something when he said no is just going to confuse him.

Anyway I digress, so again a short while later she is making tea and getting more scones out, I said Joshua can’t have one but he can have a bite of mine. But she’s buttering him one and popping a piece in his mouth, so I repeat no firmer and she leaves the scone on the side. Making me feel rotton because Joshua had seen it and I was the one who had to say no.

Just before we were due to leave and go home for a nice dinner than my hubby was cooking, my dad started to feed Joshua chips – not any chips, chip shop chips loaded with salt. Salt is bad, salt is evil so I was not happy. I repeatedly said ‘no more we’re going home for tea’ But my protests fell on deaf ears. They are unable to refuse the puppy dogs eyes of my little boy and just keep giving.
It drives me mental, it makes me feel like I’m a mean Mummy because I’m always saying no. I fully appreciate that grandparents are there to spoil and they love nothing more. However if the Mummy says no then please, please listen. Saturday resulted in my having to deal wit a major meltdown when I took him away from the chips and took him home – literally had to pin him down to strap him in the car. He was then grumpy all night, its not fair that I am left to deal with that when it could be prevented in the first place.

I’m trying to encourage a healthy attitude to food, and recently he has become a tad fussy so I don’t want him filling up on unhealthy food. What worries me most is that I am going on holiday for two weeks with my parents this year. How can I approach it without ending up losing my rag with them or spending my holiday annoyed?