Who’s more determined Mummy or toddler? Sometimes I think it’s the toddler, he’s a determined little one I will give him that much, but I have to believe I can win these daily and nightly battles we are currently going through or I’m going to go insane.
Sleep time battles are no fun for anyone, they make the whole household tired and miserable yet there isn’t a great deal you can do about them. Other than ride them out.
I was always adamant that I wouldn’t leave my children to cry it out (CIO), I felt it was cruel and it reminded me of that advert were no one answers the babies cries. Well after trying everything else, and I mean everything else we’ve found ourselves resorting to the CIO method. Controlled crying (CC) worked so well for us in the past, we’d leave J to cry for ten minutes before going back into his room, resettling and repeating as many times as necessary. Would take roughly three nights and he’d be back self settling and sleeping through. This no longer works and if anything makes J even more worked up, his screams going up a gear after we’ve been in and left again.
Tuesday night he went to bed perfectly and we found ourselves breathing a sigh of relief, however it was short lived and a mere fifty minutes later he was awake again. We tried CC for about half an hour but realised it was never going to work. He had extra cuddles, extra stories, plenty of reassurance but nothing was working so in the end we left him to CIO. Two and half hours later there was silence and he was we assumed sleeping. We didn’t dare go back in to check – we didn’t hear from him again until morning.
Wednesday, we decided CIO was the only way to go so at 7pm after half a dozen stories we kissed him and left – cue shouting, stamping feet and banging on the door for an hour. Then silence. Phew we hoped this would be it for the night, but we were never going to be that lucky. At 12:30 and 2:30 we endured another hours worth of protesting before silence again. When 5:30 came round we could deal with it no more and into our bed he came – possibly undoing everything we’d tried to establish. But after enduring so much, as well as waking at different times to feed a newborn I was shattered.
Thursday, he fell asleep mid story but we weren’t hopeful that it could stay that way. So when he woke an hour later we feared the worst, however off we went tucked him back in and he went straight back to sleep. I even managed to creep into his room at 10pm to get some nappies for the baby because stupidly I’d forgotten to get some before I put him to bed and J didn’t even stir. This was too good to be true right? Correct at just gone midnight, when we’d finally managed to settle a windy baby he woke. 45 minutes later and there was silence and we could finally try and get some sleep. 3am we hear him again, but both shattered we didn’t have the energy to go and put him back in his bed so we didn’t and ten minutes later there was silence and we didn’t hear from him again until 7:20.
So I can see the improvement, it makes me feel better about letting him CIO. It breaks my heart but he’s mostly not even crying, because there are rarely any real tears. Here is hoping that tonight there will be improvement again.
Naptimes on the other hand, I don’t even know where to begin. Yesterday we didn’t even try and have one as we were out that that was never going to happen and he was fine without. Today he was showing definite tired signs so as normal daddy takes him for his nap. Always daddy he never naps for Mummy...an hour later we give in and bring him down. How long do you let them CIO for at nap times? I have no clue. I think some google reading is required.
So there was me thinking it was going to be the newborn keeping us up all night, but it’s the toddler. Yes R wakes, but generally, wakes feeds, nappy change and he settles back down. Its tiring and bloody hard work. I’m dreading the husband returning to work already, I have no idea how I am going to cope on my own.
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